# My Use (and Abuse) of Caffeine

By Randall Degges · September 29, 2011 · https://rdegges.com/2011/my-use-and-abuse-of-caffeine/

> How I cycle caffeine: three weeks on, one week off, 100mg to 2g a day from NoDoz and Rockstar, how it changes my mood, and why you shouldn't copy me.

![Caffeine Chart][]


[Caffeine][] is an amazing drug.  Interestingly, I've never actually written
about my extensive use of caffeine before, although it is a large part of who I
am.  As all my friends can attest, I'm an enormous caffeine junkie.  I've been
told by numerous people (my wife included) that I need to lay off the caffeine
and take it easy--or I'll end up dead.

Growing up, I never drank much caffeine--except small amounts in soda.  I could
never stand the taste of coffee (although this is beginning to change--I still
don't see myself ever drinking coffee on a daily basis).  My first real
experience with caffeine was during my schooling at the
[University of California, Santa Cruz][], which is where I tried my first
energy drink.  One of my roommates routinely drank [these][], and eventually I
came around to trying them (they were awesome, by the way).  After that, it was
pretty much game over.  Energy drinks tasted awesome, and made me feel amazing.

Actually, they still do.

Through years of experimentation, I've come to realize how much caffeine has
changed me as a person.


## My Normal (un-caffeinated) Self

The *normal* Randall is a pretty awful guy.  He procrastinates, is easily
distracted, and is typically negative by nature.  When I'm not caffeinated, I
feel like a completely different person.

The first thing I've noticed about my un-caffeinated self is that I tend to
over think things, and not in a good way.  I won't go as far as saying I'm
paranoid, but I over analyze even the smallest situations and make them into
big issues.  When I'm un-caffeinated, I tend to argue a lot more frequently
with my wife about stupid things, like who replaced the trash and who did the
dishes.

This over analysis also carries over into other parts of my life, including my
work and health.  When un-caffeinated, I tend to feel overly stressed out by
the business of startup life, and let this stress bleed over into my exercise
and eating habits, which rapidly degrade.  The biggest problem with this is
that I'll focus all my energy, effort, stress and worry on a single item, and
let all my other responsibilities, goals and commitments suffocate.  It
probably doesn't help that I tend to be an obsessive person by nature, and have
problems focusing on multiple things at a time.  Without caffeine, this side of
me seems to run amuck.

When un-caffeinated, I also feel overwhelmingly negative.  Instead of looking
at life in a positive, enthusiastic way--I tend to view even the most fun
experiences as chores (horrible, I know).  Although I really do love writing
code on my free time, when I'm not on caffeine I have an extremely hard time
making myself do it, even though I want to, as it just seems like a pointless
chore.  This isn't always the case--but overall, I tend to be far more negative
when I'm un-caffeinated.


## The Better (caffeinated) Me

When I'm on caffeine--I feel amazing.  I've never done any hard drugs before,
but I can't imagine that they'd make me feel any better than caffeine does.
When I'm on caffeine, I feel like a monster.  I feel powerful, calm, smart,
enthusiastic, energetic, positive, and unconquerable.  Nothing can get me down.

The most obvious effect caffeine has on me is my mental state.  Within 20
minutes of taking 100+ mg of caffeine, I begin to feel calm (this is the
opposite effect that most people tend to have, or so I've been told).  It is a
good sort of calm--a samurai calm, if you will.  I feel as if I have the power
to do what I want to do, whenever I please.  I feel confident, insightful, and
peaceful.

After the calm sets in, I notice that my thoughts become clearer and more
precise.  Instead of feeling pulled in numerous directions by things I want
(and need) to do: work, exercise, eat, work on projects, etc.--I feel an
overwhelming sense of self-direction.  I'm able to pick what is most important
to me at the moment, and put all my effort and focus into this task, which
gives me an amazing sense of self of fulfilment.  The greatest part about this
clarity in my mind is that it puts me into "the zone", and after finishing one
thing, my momentum builds, and the snowball effect takes over.

The physical effects caffeine has on me are also amazing.  When caffeinated, I
have unlimited physical energy. In fact, of all my workouts in the past few
years, the best ones were done in a caffeinated state.  When I workout with
caffeine, I'm able to push myself much harder and for longer periods of time
than I can otherwise.

Caffeine also keeps me satiated.  The more caffeine I take, the less hungry I
feel--and this feeling lasts for hours at a time.  200mg of caffeine and I
won't be hungry (at all) for ~4 hours.  This has been particularly useful to me
as it helps me avoid consuming unnecessary calories throughout the day in the form of
snacks.

Lastly, being caffeinated makes me feel happy.  I truly feel like I'm the
person I was "meant to be" when I'm taking caffeine.  As awful as this sounds,
I really feel like I'm at my best, and my happiest, when I'm caffeinated.  I'm
able to enjoy each moment of life as I pass through it, which puts me at peace
internally.


## The (dirty) Details of My Caffeine Usage

It is actually rather hard for me to write about this, as I can't help but feel
somewhat embarrassed at my caffeine usage--but here it goes anyway.

**NOTE**: Don't do what I do.  It's probably extremely risky and unhealthy, and
I *know* that I need to change my habits significantly.

I cycle caffeine.  I've read tons of articles on the drug, and realize that my
cycling isn't as effective as it could be (in large part because I don't go off
it long enough to really flush it completely out of my system), but it has been
effective for me.  Keep in mind that the amounts of caffeine listed below are
less effective at higher weights.  I'm a fairly big guy (~220lbs), so these
amounts would likely be *really* dangerous for someone smaller.

My general cycle is three weeks on caffeine, one week off.  After years of
messing around with caffeine in various quantities and cycles, this has been
the most effective for me.  By effective I mean that it allows me to feel good
for the maximum amount of time, without having the burnout that comes with too
much caffeine usage over a sustained period of time (I'll get into that later).

In any given month, I'll typically go the first week of the month
un-caffeinated.  Considering the amounts of caffeine I take the rest of the
month, and the amount of time required to fully flush caffeine from one's
system, the week that I do spend un-caffeinated is actually still pretty good
for me.  The remaining caffeine in my system keeps me feeling pretty good
through the week, even though I'm not taking it.  This week is especially
important in the cycle because without it, I'll begin feeling groggy, and
burnt-out.  I've found that one week is just enough time to let my body catch
up with me, and it allows me to get the most consistent effect from caffeine
over long periods of time.

The other three weeks of the month are variable.  I'll take anywhere from 100mg
to 2g (max) of caffeine per day, fluctuating its usage as necessary.  I try to
gradually increase my usage--for example: week 2 (of a month) I'll take between
100mg and 400mg of caffeine.  Week 3 I'll take between 400mg and 600mg.  Week 4
I'll take anywhere from 100mg to 2g.

**NOTE**: Days when I take more than 1g of caffeine are *always* followed by
days with very low dosages of caffeine--100mg or 200mg, as I'm afraid I'll
overdo it.

In regards to the types of caffeine I take--I only take it in one of two ways:

-   [NoDoz caffeine pills][] (each pill is 100mg of pure caffeine), or
-   [Zero Carb Rockstar Energy Drinks][] (they taste like fruit punch, have
    only 10 calories, and 240mg of caffeine per can).

The NoDoz pills are great because they're pure caffeine--no other stuff mixed
in, so you know that you're doing it is as pure a way as possible.  The Zero
Carb Rockstars are great because they have great flavor, almost no calories, no
carbs (no sugar), and are nice to sip on while you're working.  The Rockstars
allow you to spread your caffeine intake out a bit more, instead of ingesting
it all at once.


## How I Feel When I Overdo It

There have been a few times when I've overdone it on the caffeine.  When this
happens, I'll feel it the following morning when I wake up.  The feeling is
awful.  I feel dehydrated, groggy, sick, and slow.  The only thing that helps
is to sit down in a quiet, dark place, and drink lots of water.

This has happened only a few times, but each time has been a horrible
experience.

What led me to originally cycle my caffeine usage was that after 3 weeks of
taking caffeine, I would begin to feel groggy, sick and dehydrated every
morning.  It wouldn't be as severe as it was when I knew I took to much in a
single day--but it would be enough to negatively effect me.  The week off of
caffeine at the beginning of each month allows me to reap the benefits of
extended caffeine usage everyday, without any bad days.


## My Behavior

I realize that I need to bring my caffeine usage down a lot.  While I don't
consider caffeine to be bad in any way, I do realize that taking it in high
doses, frequently, can lead to lots of bad health effects.

For the sake of myself, my wife, and my dog, I've specifically begun reducing
my caffeine usage during my 3 week cycle.  I'm currently try to take no more
than 500mg per day, maximum--which is a far leap from my prior usage.  So far,
my reduced caffeine usage has been going pretty well.  I still feel awesome, so
I'll continue to keep it up.

I hope that one day, both my normal (un-caffeinated) and caffeinated self can
be the same person.  I've got a lot of work to do.


[Caffeine Chart]: caffeine-chart.png "Caffeine Chart"
  [Caffeine]: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caffeine "Caffeine"
  [University of California, Santa Cruz]: http://www.ucsc.edu/ "UC Santa Cruz"
  [these]: http://www.wiredenergydrink.com/ "Wired Energy Drinks"
  [NoDoz caffeine pills]: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000NVNLTS/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B000NVNLTS&linkCode=as2&tag=rdegges-20 "NoDoz Caffeine Pills"
  [Zero Carb Rockstar Energy Drinks]: https://web.archive.org/web/20210211065913/https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000NGNEKY "Zero Carb Rockstar"
